Stress and Relaxation

• Find it hard to cope - an ordinary problem can seem insurmountable, as we are easily daunted
• Suffer from fatigue, aches or pains
• Become angry very easily and/or fly off the handle
• Suffer from stomach problems such as indigestion, diarrhoea or constipation
• Sleep badly
• Find it hard to concentrate or focus
  Eat too much or too little

When we start to manage stress, it is important to recognise that it has something to do with our lifestyles or attitudes. It has nothing to do with our personal shortcomings.

The best way to manage stress is through positive change, which usually involves making a choice - we can either remove the source of the stress, or (if this is not possible) re-balance things by adding something positive into our lives. We may also need to learn some new coping mechanisms.
The first step is to review our priorities.

List all the things you think are causing you stress. Is the stress coming from any one thing or is it a combination of factors? Try and identify the major causes, then review how you respond to them. What could you do differently? If you cannot change the first one, move down the list until you find something you can change.

One way to do this is to remember a time you managed stress really well. What did you do that worked? This memory may hold a clue to a helpful coping mechanism.

If you can't remove something negative from your life, perhaps you could add something positive to give you extra support. This might not need to be a big thing. It could be as simple as taking time out to read, meditate or enjoy a moment to yourself. A simple cup of tea can do wonders!

Some Coping Mechanisms:

Positive reinforcement

When we are stressed, our self-talk is often negative and can reinforce our bad feelings. If we think more positively, we can turn this around and reduce our stress.

Think of a positive statement/affirmation that you can use when you are feeling stressed, such as: "I feel relaxed and calm", or "I'm really good at _____ , I can deal with this."

Decide what you can control and work on that - let the rest go.

Take a short break - walk away from the problem for a moment to regain perspective.

Relaxation

Do something you find relaxing - listen to music, do something creative, garden, meditate or just go for a walk. Any form of exercise can help with stress.

Relaxation techniques don't necessarily take a lot of time. There's deep breathing, stretching or visualising something that really makes you feel happy or relaxed.

Progressive muscle relaxation

Do something you find relaxing - listen to music, do something creative, garden, meditate or just go for a walk. Any form of exercise can help with stress.

Relaxation techniques don't necessarily take a lot of time. There's deep breathing, stretching or visualising something that really makes you feel happy or relaxed.

Sit or lie down somewhere quiet and comfortable, then close your eyes.

Tighten and relax your muscles. Start with your feet and work up through your legs, your torso, your and even your face. When you tighten the muscles, do so for about 30 seconds and then let them go really loose.

Feel which parts of your body are tight and do them again.

Relax completely and feel your body become heavy. When you are ready to get up, do so slowly and gently.

Meditation

There are a number of different ways to meditate. You can learn by going to a class or use tapes or books. Here's a simple technique you can try:

• Make sure you are somewhere comfortable and quiet
• Sit or lie without crossing your legs or arms
• Listen to your breathing. As you become aware of your breathing, start to count each breath. Each time you get distracted and lose count, just start counting again
• Do this for just a few minutes to start. Gradually increase the time spent until you are meditating for just 15 or 20 minutes

Time management

As we get stressed, our time management deteriorates. Take some time to take stock and review what you want to achieve. It helps to include personal goals as well as work goals. Once you are sure that you know what you want to achieve, write a list of the things you want to get done.

Most 'to do' lists tend to be prioritised by urgency rather than importance. This can mean that while you're getting the urgent things done, the big things get left behind. Try prioritising by the impact the activity has on your goals instead. See if you can start with the thing that will move you forward the most. This is not always possible, but approaching your time management this way can reduce overall stress because of the sense of achievement that comes with it.

Get rid of daily irritants/tolerations

We all put up with things that drain our energy unnecessarily. For example, if you have a messy car that irritates you every time you get into it, address the problem and take the time to get it cleaned.
Write a list of the 10 things that you put up with that drain your energy.

As you deal with the list and cross items off it, you'll feel your energy and sense of well-being increase. If there are some things you cannot afford to change or need help with – get creative. It could be that someone else will help you out if you can do something equally supportive for them.

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